It is very difficult to comprehend the fact that we are living in a modern world where there has always been researched medication for every disease which in turn brought comfort and relief to patients when they contracted any disease... but here we are in 2021 where we are faced with a life threatening disease and all we can do is treat it symptomatically. This is one of the many factors that I reflected on after contracting the dreaded COVID 19 in December.
It's an experience I embraced and challenged concurrently and at different times during my illness and an experience which I will never forget. For me my experience of this disease appeared in 2 waves...
The onset of the pandemic allowed me to have my one foot in the drama and chaos but also allowed me to have an exit strategy whereby I could switch off from negative news, constant drama and fear and retreat to my safe place...my home. I could choose to stay away from public places, order all I needed online without any threat of contracting any illness and had the luxury of unlimited wifi which allowed me to watch uplifting movies on netflix, attend virtual meetings and read. My awareness of this devastation was real but somehow my safe place allowed me to enjoy life as I knew it, without trepidation, without the fear of the unknown and without the constant updates on deaths, over crowded hospitals and the devastating effect of collapsing economies globally.
The second wave came suddenly when this disease entered my home, my safe place, my bubble of protection. It now was within me, owned me and caused destruction without my consent. I could not run away from it now, I could not choose to ignore it or turn away from it as my body and mind was now sharing the same space with this dreaded disease.
All of a sudden, the disease that was the enemy had become a lodger in my home, my safe bubble. Would I welcome this new visitor, be rude to it or accept that this new visitor would be there to teach me a lesson in resilience,how to overcome fear, be consistent in my positive thinking or push me to limits I never thought were possible. How would I be affected by this insidious disease and which group would I ultimately be in? A "wait and see" approach was all that mattered
but while I was in this transition period of diagnosis and acceptance, I was filled with dread, confusion and absolute anxiety.
How did other people cope, what were their symptoms, how did they heal themselves and what was needed to fight this disease? All these questions filled my mind until there was nothing else I could think of.
Even though the two waves were different, they shared similar feelings, both waves filled you with fear, the unknown, acceptance of a new way of living, adaption to isolation and lots of time for self reflection.
What were my coping methods?
I realized how important each breath is, which is taken so for granted at times. I made time each morning to monitor my breath so that with each out breath I imagined the disease leaving my body and then with each in breath I visualised a new opportunity to live.
Walked in the gorgeous sunshine and embraced the strength of the sun
Understood that there are 7 pillars of wellbeing.... good sleeping patterns, meditation and stress management,movement,emotional mastery,good nutrition,grounding and self awareness which I followed daily.
I learnt to quieten my mind so that I could visualize each "unwanted piece of virus" being shot out of proportion by my immunity system so that it would have no other option but to leave my body.
I manifested and affirmed daily that I am healed and healthy and that each organ and function in my body was working perfectly and without disease, imperfections or disabilities, no matter how ill and hopeless I felt.
I affirmed that I move from dis-ease to ease daily as positive energy and affirmations opened my heart so that healing could start.
I confirmed that COVID 19 is a very unwelcome guest in my body and my home and only signed a short term rental agreement.
What have I learnt from this experience?
To live fully in the present as this is all you have, nothing is more powerful than enjoying, learning and nurturing from the present moment
To be more mindful so that we can reach a strong connection with ourself and understand and accept the lessons learnt from each experience whether it is good or bad.
That your mind can be a beautiful servant but also a dangerous master. What you think impacts your body's health and vitality
All perceptions( and there are so many of them) determine your feelings, in other words your psychology affects your physiology
That I could live in either fear or love and I chose love each time.
The dark,heavy cloak that encompassed my mind, body and emotions for 3 weeks has been replaced with a light, white piece of cloth that gently flows around me with no heaviness and offers healing, good health, freedom and protection.
I am Healthy
I am Healed
I am Alive